Charlie Sheen's story takes the reader into the realms of mystery, thriller, romance and even, not to put too fine a point on it, into the realm of sexual intercourse. Charlie, being extremely selective, did it only with the most beautiful female specimens and the most passionate bedroom tigresses in the entire land. His countless lovers described his lovemaking abilities with praise not heard ever since about any other man. No matter what various laudable qualities these mistresses mentioned when whispering about their sexual experiences with Charlie, one theme was common: Charlie Sheen had the endurance of a stallion, the passion of a bonobo, the enthusiasm of a schoolboy, and the experience in pleasing a woman of a man born centuries ago. Fantastic and magical, improbably Charlie Sheen exists. He is a full-blooded person and not a carbon copy of a character from a Victorian novel. Charlie Sheen is not only a person, a human being graciously living among us, he is also a concept, an enigma, which will always tie a researcher's brain matter into Gordian Knot. Professor De Hainaut's brain was often puzzled by logical and logistical quagmires as he attempted to find solutions to Charlie's obscure quotations, statements, and facial expressions. Was it easy? Professor Herve Le Dior de Hainaut always wearily smiled when someone asked him this question. You try to facilitate the decisions of god into coherent, concise, and palatable potions acceptable for a human brain. Then you'll see the impossibility of the task, was his usual answer.
Show moreCharlie Sheen's story takes the reader into the realms of mystery, thriller, romance and even, not to put too fine a point on it, into the realm of sexual intercourse. Charlie, being extremely selective, did it only with the most beautiful female specimens and the most passionate bedroom tigresses in the entire land. His countless lovers described his lovemaking abilities with praise not heard ever since about any other man. No matter what various laudable qualities these mistresses mentioned when whispering about their sexual experiences with Charlie, one theme was common: Charlie Sheen had the endurance of a stallion, the passion of a bonobo, the enthusiasm of a schoolboy, and the experience in pleasing a woman of a man born centuries ago. Fantastic and magical, improbably Charlie Sheen exists. He is a full-blooded person and not a carbon copy of a character from a Victorian novel. Charlie Sheen is not only a person, a human being graciously living among us, he is also a concept, an enigma, which will always tie a researcher's brain matter into Gordian Knot. Professor De Hainaut's brain was often puzzled by logical and logistical quagmires as he attempted to find solutions to Charlie's obscure quotations, statements, and facial expressions. Was it easy? Professor Herve Le Dior de Hainaut always wearily smiled when someone asked him this question. You try to facilitate the decisions of god into coherent, concise, and palatable potions acceptable for a human brain. Then you'll see the impossibility of the task, was his usual answer.
Show moreHervé L'Dior de Hainaut, PhD, was born in Los Angeles to a Scottish-American aristocrat father, Haggus Lionheart, and a Filipino-Russian commoner mother, Natasha Stepanovna Kvachka. His father taught Egyptian Television Commercials at UCLA, and his mother became an exclusive housekeeper in the high social circles of Beverly Hills. De Hainaut was attending a kindergarten in LA, when his family moved to Italy, and the young boy was enrolled in Cappuccino Elementary School, in Milan. His education was expanded when he was accepted to Foie Gras high school in Paris, and he finished his undergraduate studies with a degree in Odysseus literature at Mutton College, Oxford. After unsuccessful stints as a barista and later a waiter at "The Slaughtered Calf," a London pub, he returned to France to attend Escargot University, where his formal education was concluded with a double doctorate in the Allegoric Comparisons of the Dual Nature of the Universe and the Human Body, and the Eschatology in Literature Delving into the Metamorphosis of the Existential Crisis of the Western Psyche into Something Entirely Different. And, of course, he studied Theatre Arts. He lives in a rent-controlled one-bedroom apartment in New York with two cats - Denise and Brook, teddy bear Himmelhergott, and an extensive collection of blue beach buckets.
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