"Guidelines, advice, and questions for the reader are interspersed with the narrative. This insightful book is an important guide for any family trying to care for a loved one." -- Family Caregiver Alliance Update
"His Q&A approach...is perceptive without being intrusive, instructive without being dogmatic, informative without being technical, compassionate without being maudlin and focuses on problem solving without being cookie-cutter in approach. Even if you are not now a caregiver, it is an important read since many of you will probably become one sooner than later." -- eNN: Eldercare Network News
"Jacobs has a gripping writing style and a passion for the subject that sustain the reader during even the heaviest of topics. His use of the narrative makes the book easy to follow, while creating natural places to interject advice from his extensive knowledge about the stresses of caregiving. He addresses the touchy subjects that caregivers might be ashamed or afraid to ask about, reassuring them that feelings of resentment, guilt, and isolation are normal reactions that go with the territory of caregiving." -- Newsday
"There's plenty of practical advice on communication and finding meaning in suffering, but Jacobs's most valuable contribution is that he lays out the most dreadful selfish, unworthy thoughts anyone looking after a terminally ill parent could possibly have--and then assures us: Everyone feels that way." -- Philadelphia
"Wise material....A collection of questions and answers explores different facets of the caregiving task and offers specific tips and strategies for success. The resources section lists a variety of organisations, publications, and web sites....Highly recommended." -- Library Journal (starred review)
"Guidelines, advice, and questions for the reader are interspersed with the narrative. This insightful book is an important guide for any family trying to care for a loved one." -- Family Caregiver Alliance Update
"His Q&A approach...is perceptive without being intrusive, instructive without being dogmatic, informative without being technical, compassionate without being maudlin and focuses on problem solving without being cookie-cutter in approach. Even if you are not now a caregiver, it is an important read since many of you will probably become one sooner than later." -- eNN: Eldercare Network News
"Jacobs has a gripping writing style and a passion for the subject that sustain the reader during even the heaviest of topics. His use of the narrative makes the book easy to follow, while creating natural places to interject advice from his extensive knowledge about the stresses of caregiving. He addresses the touchy subjects that caregivers might be ashamed or afraid to ask about, reassuring them that feelings of resentment, guilt, and isolation are normal reactions that go with the territory of caregiving." -- Newsday
"There's plenty of practical advice on communication and finding meaning in suffering, but Jacobs's most valuable contribution is that he lays out the most dreadful selfish, unworthy thoughts anyone looking after a terminally ill parent could possibly have--and then assures us: Everyone feels that way." -- Philadelphia
"Wise material....A collection of questions and answers explores different facets of the caregiving task and offers specific tips and strategies for success. The resources section lists a variety of organisations, publications, and web sites....Highly recommended." -- Library Journal (starred review)
Prologue
1. First Days
2. Defining Commitments
3. Utilizing Support
4. Handling Sacrifice
5. Weighing Hope and Acceptance, Fantasy and Reality
6. Fostering Awareness and Flexibility
7. Protecting Intimacy
8. Sustaining the Spirit
9. Last Days
Epilogue: Caregiving's Aftermath
Resources
Barry J. Jacobs, PsyD, works with couples and families coping with serious health problems. He has faculty appointments at Temple University, the University of Pennsylvania, and Widener University, and is the Director of Behavioral Sciences for the Crozer-Keystone Family Medicine Residency Program in Springfield, Pennsylvania. He is also a widely published journalist who has written extensively for The Village Voice and other publications. Currently, he writes an advice column for Take Care!, the quarterly newsletter of the National Family Caregivers Association and edits the In Sickness & Health column for the journal Families, Systems & Health. He lives with his wife and their two children in Swarthmore, Pennsylvania.
'I've known Barry Jacobs for many years, but not until I read the prologue to this book did I realize that as a child he had been part of a caregiving family. I should have known, though - only someone who has 'walked in the shoes' could have written such a compassionate and simultaneously helpful book. It reads like a novel but also provides really good, straightforward, worthwhile advice. This is a 'must read' for every family caregiver.' "- Suzanne Mintz, President and Cofounder, National Family Caregivers Association"" " 'This is a beautifully written, invaluable, practical guide for families facing serious illness or disability. This unique and truly masterful book combines the wisdom of Dr. Jacobs's extensive professional expertise with his moving personal story of parental illness and loss. Following one family's journey with illness, the book addresses all the tough issues while providing a powerful model for resilience and the personal rewards that can come with caregiving. This superb book is a 'must' for family caregivers and healthcare professionals. I will strongly recommend it to my patients and their families.' "- John S. Rolland, MD, Department of Psychiatry, University of Chicago "
'I've known Barry Jacobs for many years, but not until I read the prologue to this book did I realize that as a child he had been part of a caregiving family. I should have known, though - only someone who has 'walked in the shoes' could have written such a compassionate and simultaneously helpful book. It reads like a novel but also provides really good, straightforward, worthwhile advice. This is a 'must read' for every family caregiver.' "- Suzanne Mintz, President and Cofounder, National Family Caregivers Association"" " 'This is a beautifully written, invaluable, practical guide for families facing serious illness or disability. This unique and truly masterful book combines the wisdom of Dr. Jacobs's extensive professional expertise with his moving personal story of parental illness and loss. Following one family's journey with illness, the book addresses all the tough issues while providing a powerful model for resilience and the personal rewards that can come with caregiving. This superb book is a 'must' for family caregivers and healthcare professionals. I will strongly recommend it to my patients and their families.' "- John S. Rolland, MD, Department of Psychiatry, University of Chicago "
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